They Said It Better Than I Ever Could...

These words that I write, they keep me from total insanity. -Charles Bukowski

Who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived, or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed? -Dr. Hunter S. Thompson

Oct 24, 2010

1000 Words On Accountability...

Tonight an inmate (child molester) said to me, “Well all I allegedly did was look at some pictures.  I’m not as bad as the assholes who make the pictures.”
To which I responded, “did you ever stop to think that if shitheads like you didn’t want to see those pictures then the assholes that made them wouldn’t do it?  You know its kinda like McDonalds, if everyone all of a sudden stopped eating Big Mac’s eventually McDonalds would stop making them, Fuck Stick!!!”
Most people know that in my job you have to have some exceedingly thick skin.  And I do.  I don’t mind listening to inmates calling me a turnkey, or a half a cop, or an abused child that wants to get back at everyone by fucking with them, or whatever the hell else they want to say.  They talk about your mother, father, sisters, brothers and everyone else.  They call your sexuality into question, they disparage your girlfriend, your wife, your kids and anyone else they can think of just to get a rise out of you.  To all of this I respond with a very simple, “Yeah, but come 10 o’clock you’re getting locked in a cell like an animal and I’m headed home to do whatever the fuck I want to do.”
All the insults and jabs are easy to take.  The only thing that has ever gotten under my skin with these guys is their moral relativism.  Meaning that they look at the world through comparison.  “Hey, I’m not as bad as him so I must be okay.”
Wrong again fellas, but its not just them.  It seems that its everyone nowadays.  What the fuck is going on around here?  When did we become a culture that doesn’t accept responsibility for our own problems and shortcomings?
From so many people that don’t have a job, and haven’t had one for a while you hear a constant chorus of excuses and “its not my fault”.  
From many people who can’t seem to make a long term relationship work (myself included, except I realize that its my own asshole fault) you hear how it was the other person’s fault and they ruined everything.
Fat asses blame the fast food industry.
From those in prison I hear this one all the time, society made me this way.  My mommy didn’t love me enough so I dealt drugs.  My daddy hit me when I was 8, so I had to mess with 47 little kids.  But hey at least I’m not as bad as him.
You hear about all the lawsuits that people file whenever something doesn’t go the way its supposed to.  Usually due to the negligence and/or stupidity of the person in question.  Tobacco lawsuits are a prime example.  In my entire life, never has ANYONE ever told me that cigarettes are okay.  I realize that back in the day (WAY BACK) doctor’s even endorsed cigarettes.  But for at least 40 years everyone has known that cigarettes are bad.  And if you didn’t know that cigarettes are bad, well then I pray you keep smoking so that you die early because we can’t be keeping people as dumb as you around without incurring some big time societal costs.
Now where did this all come from?  Hell if I know.  I’d like to know.  If you know please tell me.
What do we do about it?  Hold everyone accountable, for everything they do!
The only people in this world that can’t be held accountable are those who through either birth, or twist of fate, are physically or mentally disabled.  Those are the only ones that I can see cutting any slack at all.
Accountability is the only way out of this snake pit.  You do this or that.  You earn the just reward for that action.  Regardless of whether that reward is good or bad.  NO exceptions, no extenuating circumstances, no psychological evaluation, no good time, no nothing.  
You steal, you go to jail or you restore to the person you stole from equal value.
You kill someone unlawfully (loophole for soldiers), its over pal.
You molest a kid, its over pal.
You rape someone, its over pal.
You smoke, enjoy your cancer.  Oh and by the way, you either pay for your own medical treatment or you don’t get it.
You don’t save for your own retirement, enjoy working until the day before you die.
You don’t pay your bills, enjoy living in a cardboard box.
and on and on I could go.
But I won’t because I realize that some of these stances aren’t really defensible but I can dream can’t I.  A world where a person is judged by their actions, and nothing else.  The rewards that a person garners in their lifetime are simply a reflection of their character and actions.
This epidemic even applies to people that are doing the things they should be doing.  For example, I heard a guy talking in a bar to his buddy.  The guy actually uttered the words, “Hey man, I take care of my kids!  I send her money every month, just because I slapped her around a bit doesn’t mean I should have to have a babysitter just to spend some time with my kid.”
Pretty easy to break this one down.  First of all, married or not, a real man takes care of his kids.  Its not something that you should be rewarded for.  YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO IT.  There’s no other option, either you do and you’re not a shithead.  Or you don’t and you are a shithead.  So I guess the reward for taking fiscal care of your kids is not being a shithead.
Secondly, when you slap a woman around, guess what?  You do deserve to have a babysitter when you see your kids.  Simple.
Judge me by my actions.  There is right and wrong.  Good and bad.  Black and white.  Anyone who says differently is selling something.


  1. outstanding words!

    how did we get into this mess??? beats me. but, it sucks.
    lack of accountability is across the board...all walks of life. how nice it would be if you, MP working in a prison were the only one to share such stories. I work in a zip code where houses average $900K fact Dan Snyder's wife (owner of Redskins) brought her kids to our pumpkin patch on Saturday. Kids run thru our gift shop, glass flying as they break things...never an offer to pay for anything or even an "I'm sorry".
    This has somehow become our world and it is very sad AND very wrong.

    Perhaps it comes down to the handful of us who have moral fiber-to save the world. Trust me, lifting between 2,000 and 4,000 pounds of pumpkins a day, makes one tired and cranky and simply not going to take it anymore! The closer we get to Halloween, the closer I come to hanging some stupidass, irresponsible parent upside down from a tree and tossing gravel at them...(it's only a dream, calm down-you won't be visiting me in the Maryland big house).

    People are far too self-absorbed and this 'age of entitlement' will most certainly be the downfall of our nation...unless it turns around.

    Uh-oh...don't think responses were to be 1000 words as well :)

  2. Just one thing I noticed out of everything you said...Fat asses? Do we still live in such a world where all overweight people are lumped into the category "fat ass"? Not EVERYONE that is fat blames the fast food industry, many have legitimate medical conditions that have contributed to their weight problems, whether it be a side effect of a medicine they are taking or a metabolic problem...My point is that while I agree 100% with your article, I think you are doing a great injustice to overweight people around the world that are fighting their weight head on every day and taking responsibility for themselves to try and get back in healthy shape. Accountability is one thing, overcoming a medical condition is another, to which the person should be held accountable!

  3. Well, I suppose your right. Anyone battling a medical condition would understand that they are not included in the net I cast on accountability.

    Now, first and foremost let me say that I am myself, a fat ass. Running about 320 on a 6'3" frame. Not good.

    Its no one's fault but mine. I ate too much and exercised too little. I made myself this way.

    Those are the people that I'm talking about...

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