The Real Face of Online Dating

Online dating, the internet. Its an absolute cesspool of humanities worst dregs. Some of them have vaginas so what the hell. Since my wife has proposed this open marriage shit, Er.. I mean thing. I promised I would give it a chance.

So here I sit at the kitchen table typing away at this thing, while she is over on the couch texting God knows who. Most likely setting up a date for this weekend where she will go and promptly get her ankles pinned to her ears. I don't remember signing up for this.

But I suppose I got myself into this mess. I didn't really pay as much attention as I should. I didn't put in much effort sexually, romantically or otherwise. So I guess I'm getting what I've got coming? You know what, fuck that. That's bullshit. This isn't something that I deserve. Its not my fault she didn't say word one about the fact that she liked BDSM. Yes folks, that's where the impetus for this whole thing came from.

She wants to get tied up and whipped like 50 shades of fucktard. So I have to offer up my wife to the internet and the Armageddon of dick picks, and dicks that populate it? Yes apparently, that is what I have to do. It still strikes me funny that through all of this, no matter what I said, it was never considered that this was the wrong choice. It was always the right way, because it was what she wanted. She even found a therapist who would back her up. So that's been a fun hour once a week that I have to drive another hour for.

I'm not going next week. I'm not sure where this is gonna go. I must seem really pathetic. Which is most likely true. She wants me to see this as fun. Something we'll be able to look back and at and smile when we're old because we didn't let the time we had left fucking go to waste. I suppose she's right about that. Which doesn't change the insane amount of jealousy I'm going to feel while she's out and about with them ankles in the air.

I don't know how this is going to go, or maybe I do and I'm just stringing it out for some damn reason. I don't know what. I think the next few months are going to be either extremely fun, or extremely tumultuous. Stay tuned...this might get good, but it might get bad too.